Here is a Federal Terrorist Hunting Permit.


As you can see, it entitles the bearer to hunt terrorists "day or night, with or without dogs." The people who sell these permits note that "Our Terrorist Hunting Permit Decals are from the same company that supplies US military exchanges throughout the world," which is important: this is how you know that it's for real.
The permit number on this particular hunting license is "91101." (Get it? 9/11, 2001? Get it?) Such permits are for sale by many retailers of stupid patriotic shit (such as here and here and here and here and here), which is sort of odd: usually hunting permits (and actually, permits which allow you to do just about anything that you're not normally allowed to do) are available from one issuing authority (and it's usually a government entity of some type, not a private seller of faux-patriotic trash, but whatever). Usually, also, permits -- hunting permits, for example -- have different permit numbers; the whole point, after all, of specifying a permit number is so that enforcing agencies can distinguish one permit from another, but again: whatever.
The various permits that you can buy vary a little from issuing retailer to issuing retailer. As you can see, this particular one doesn't expire; it's "permanent." Others expire (one is only good from 2005 to 2053, for example.) Another says on it, "do not question or detain the bearer of this license as he is operating under orders from above your jurisdiction." Which is interesting: possessing most permits does not constitute an "order" of any type; it merely permits you to, for example, kill one deer during the course of one hunting season. Also, I'm not sure that "orders from above your jurisdiction" sounds completely legit to me (and by the way, this is the only permit of any type I've ever seen which doesn't specify who issued it. Interesting, right?).
Can you imagine what sort of dipshit troglodyte you'd need to be to go to the trouble of buying one of these "permits"? Can you imagine the amount of undiluted malevolence you'd need to have in your heart to stick one of these on the bumper of your car? Do people who display these things believe that to do so is the "American" thing to do? The brave thing to do, perhaps?
And these people do exist; they exist, even, in upstate New York, a few hours from New York City. I was up there last year and saw one of these stickers on the bumper of a pickup truck. I've seen the evidence. These psychopaths are the types of people who'd join the SS if this were Germany in the 1930s. And they're allowed to vote (really, they are). I suppose it's some comfort to think that there are show-witted nationalistic fuckwads in most countries, and only occasionally are they actually in a position to do any real harm to the countries they love so deeply.

